According to the American College of Sports Medicine, “Approximately 30% of women and 25% of men who are student-athletes report having anxiety, and only 10% of all college athletes with known mental health conditions seek care from a mental health professional” (2021). The average high school soccer team has 20 players, meaning an average of six players will struggle with their mental health at some point. The average high school softball team is around 15 players, again meaning an average of four and a half players will have difficulties relating to their mental health. With statistics like that, it is hard as a coach to know that at any given point that many of your players can be struggling, some of them silently, with something that they can get help with but probably do not know how to ask for it.

Growing up as a student-athlete it is common to face struggles, it is part of life, right? I was taught that “rough patches along our journeys will continue to occur in our lives for as long as you live.” Although I always believed my “rough patch” would be a bad grade or a broken limb. I believed wrong. My battle is a mental challenge that is rapidly growing in our society today that many teens, including myself, lose themselves to.

Ever since I first started playing lacrosse I’ve had a love-hate relationship with it. There have been points in my life where I never wanted to pick up my stick again and points where I couldn't put it down. Though there were many times when quitting the sport I’ve played since first grade was at the forefront of my mind, my sport was still there for me. Lacrosse has been there for me more than any friend I’ve ever had. When all my relationships withered and I was at my lowest point, my sport stuck with me. If I wanted to play or not, I’ve always had an outlet, and I’ve always gone back to it. There are many things I have struggled with growing up as a student-athlete. From balancing academics, sports, family and friends, to having a healthy relationship with food and my body image.

I've learned that adversity doesn't define us; it refines us. It tests our limits, challenges our resilience, and forces us to dig deep and discover the strength we never knew we had. It's not about avoiding the storms but learning to dance in the rain, embracing the challenges, and growing stronger through the struggle. Most importantly my mom taught me how to always keep fighting, to Fight like Peggy.

“Are you falling out of love with your sport?” This question has ultimately led to multiple turning points throughout my life that have shaped the evolution of my character and the values which I hold tightly to today. My earliest memory of falling in love with a sport was when I was around 4 years old in gymnastics. I loved being able to compete in multiple events and constantly learning new skills and routines, I loved having a close-knit team that felt like a bunch of sisters, and I especially loved being able to show my elementary peers how long I could handstand.

It’s okay to not be okay. It’s how you fight that defines you. I chose to fight, and one day I will be back on the court playing. Even when it feels like there is nothing else left, like everything has gone wrong, it is important to remember that it will get better on the other side.

Growing up, my parents always told me I needed to find something I loved. For as long as I can remember, sports have always been that “something”. Playing sports was my escape from reality. That was until I became my own worst enemy.

Seven. That’s how often I’d cross the white lines confining the dirt game I love. Seven innings. No matter what happened the inning before–crushing an extra-base hit, snagging a line drive at the hot corner, striking out, or not executing a play—I’d still cross the chalk and there would always be another chance, another game.

I have been involved in sports for as long as I can remember. I have also struggled with my mental health for years now. I have struggled with anxiety, depression, and OCD. Playing sports while dealing with these struggles has shaped who I am as a person and player today. I have been through a wide variety of experiences and issues regarding mental health as I’ve also been involved in sports.

As an athlete, and especially as a female, we can often feel the need to put on a smile and make it seem like we are always feeling and playing our best. It can feel like there are teams or coaches relying on you to always be there and to make every play perfect. We fight repetitive feelings of anger or sadness in order to seem put together and not “dramatic” or “over reactant” to our surroundings and games. This mindset can become extremely unhealthy though. Choosing to put how you look on the outside over how you feel on the inside can severely negatively affect you mentally and physically. It will also affect how you act and feel on and off the field.